I’ll be doing the Moth, once again, on June 23rd in Boston! It’s at the beautiful Wilbur Theater on Tremont Street. IT IS SOLD OUT! AM I NERVOUS NO I’M NOT NERVOUS WHY WOULD I BE NERVOUS I’M TOTALLY NOT STRESS EATING AN ENTIRE BAGUETTE WITH A PLATE OF CHEESE NO OF COURSE NOT BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN I’M STRESSED AND I’M NOT. Obv.
So if you managed to score tickets to the show then please come by and say hello! I will say hello back!
Here is a photo of a wombat which is not relevant to anything but your interests.
Are you in St. Paul or Minneapolis or the environs?
Do you like to listen to stories?
Do you like cheese curds?
Do you love cheese curds?
If you answered yes to the questions above, then here is some important news that’s tangentially related to cheese curds:
I’ll be doing The Moth on November 7 in St. Paul. It’ll be at the Fitzgerald Theater, which I’m told seats 1000, which means WHAT I am PEEING ALL OVER MYSELF RIGHT NOW. From fear. Not from, you know, just needing to pee and being too lazy to walk to the bathroom or whatever.
I will be eating cheese curds. The first time I had them I was visiting my friend Rhena in Minneapolis and I thought, dude cheese curds are awesome, how was there a cheese product that I’d NEVER had before? It was a crazy discovery-slash-revelation.
True story: Cheese curds are hard to get in NYC.
You know what’s also hard to get in NYC? Ebola. Unless you’re eating someone’s vomit, which you aren’t, because you’re too busy eating pizza, then you will be ebola free.
So to sum it up: The Moth in St. Paul on Friday, Nov. 7. No to ebola, yes to cheese curds.
This is the perfect opportunity to ask me how I got my hair so shiny and soft.
I’ll be reading with Doretta Lau and Aaron Peck. They are Canadian so they are very polite and want to be your friends and do not want to offend you and they will say sorry a hundred times in their adorable Canadian way. But they are also amazing writer-human hybrids.
See you there, friends!
Thursday, May 1, 7 to 9pm
Word Up Community Bookstore
2113 Amsterdam Avenue (Washington Heights)
“Don’t the networks have room for an Asian-American Tina Fey?”
HOLY WHAT THE WHAT?! I guess I can go die now because no one will ever say anything nicer to me than that. Folks, that was it. Game over. Now I will go eat this entire bag of Extreme Doritos and stop exercising because fuck it, there’s nothing left to live for.
This is how I feel right now.
Yes, that is a mini-pig eating a mini-ice cream. It is the only time a mini-ice cream is acceptable. (Thanks to Laura for texting me that.)
Also, blogging is apparently not a thing I do much. Instead, I’ve been posting photos and snarky shit over on the Annietown Facebook and Twitter. If you “like” my stupid shit then you will be able to enjoy pictures of llamas and a sign that says “Clothing Optional.”
True story: A chiropractor asked me how I chose “Annietown” and I said it’s because “Annie Choi” was taken. The moral of the story is that sometimes true stories are fucking boring.
People are saying nice things about SHUT UP, YOU’RE WELCOME! Yay!
First, Meg Cabot has been recommending my book all over town, including the official publication of hotels everywhere, USA Today. This is kiiinnnnnndddd of like getting a personal hug and a giant chocolate cake (without frosting because fuck that shit) from a hero. I love Meg Cabot, she is one part workhorse and two parts dreamboat, topped off with a tiara. HOW can one woman do all this?
SHUT UP also got a supremely kick ass review in this month’s BUST Magazine. It got a four boob review! Four boobs! Who doesn’t love boobs, amirite?
“It’s as if a friend with great comedic timing was telling you a very animated story about losing her luggage.”
The great Patricia O’Toole once told me “Bad for life, good for writing.” This is how I approach Virgin America now.
“I found sprightly anecdotes galore and prose technique to rival the best humorists now working in this style.”
High praise! High praise! I am high, on praise! Now I will operate heavy machinery.
Thanks for all your support, everyone. I am super stoked about this book and grateful that it’s out in the wild, doing it’s thing. Meanwhile a mouse is living under my stove and doing mousey things like being a dick and pooping on the floor I just vacuumed and mopped. I know it’s weird that humans poop in a can of water (when you think about it, it’s really bizarre) but mice just poop wherever. Like they literally shit where they eat. It’s gross. My current mood is “keeping it real.”
Hey Bay Area peeps! I’ll be reading, signing, and giving away stickers that smell like “never gonna give you up” and “never gonna let you down.” If you’re not sure what that smells like, then you should come tonight and smell for yourself. It smells pretty gnarly. Books will be for sale of course!
Hey friends! The Powerhouse Arena reading is TONIGHT at 7pm! There’ll be wine and also STICKERS. Specifically scratch n’ sniff and some crazy rainbow puke ones by LISA FRANK. This is your chance to get a sticker of three dogs sitting on a sundae. The dogs are wearing sunglasses. There are also unicorns sitting on a sundae and kittens sitting on a sundae. Lisa Frank likes to draw animals sitting on sundaes.