MICROSOFT: ADMIRAL FAIL
I am trying to download Office on a computer. It is a Mac. I do not steal Office because I decide to do things the “legal” way because legalness is the way to go here, in this particular case for this particular person’s computer. So I go to the Microsoft website, there’s a big banner: HEY KIDS, IT’S BACK TO SCHOOL, GET MICROSOFT OFFICE FOR, LIKE, $99 OMG IT’S A SALE. I’m like Hell yeah motherfuckers! Let’s get ON this bitch! Everyone loves a bargain!
I go, it is purchased, I start the download, and that is when I SEE THE HUGE ERROR. It is downloading an exe file. This is a PC file. This is not a Mac file. I have just purchased PC version of Office for a MAC. THERE IS ERROR. MAJOR FAIL. Nay, ADMIRAL FAIL. It is a COLONEL failure of 11 secret herbs and spices. So I think to myself this is such horseshit. Here is why:
1. A website should know if you are accessing it from a PC or a Mac. This is not a supersecret thing. Many sites do this. If I am on a Mac and I need to buy and then download software, it should know, hey, you should get the Mac version because you are on a Mac!
2. But let’s say Option 1 is not an option because you do not know how to run or program a website even though you are a computing and software giant. If you are downloading a digital version of software, you should be given the HEY DOWNLOAD THE PC VERSION or HEY FRIEND, HERE’S THE MAC VERSION! BFF-4-EVA! This was not given to me. No.
3. There’s no 3, because 1 and 2 should be enough reason.
Surely I am not the only asshole this has happened to, right? Also! Mac version of Office is $50 more expensive. I wanted to just SHARE THAT WITH YOU. I have been penalized for being awesome. Fine. Suit yourself Microsoft. I could’ve stolen this crap, but I didn’t and now I realize I probably should’ve because stealing was actually easier than buying. You are MAKING ME STEAL, FOOL. You are turning me into some kind of criminal.
End of rant. Thank you for being a friend.
Two words: (besides STAY GOLD)
Open. Office.
Of course, I hear there’s something about how you can’t create documents? Or something? I don’t know. You can research that on your fancy Mac.
I’m a software junkie so I keep my PC although I imagine software piracy — not that I partake in such things, Mr. FBI — is much more satisfying for a Mac user because of the surcharge that’s sometimes associated with Mac software.
That CAN’T be a real tattoo right?
Anybody with that tattoo would never have sex again.
It’s because Microsoft is jealous of Macs. Microsoft is painfully aware of its inferiority and childishly lashes out at the far better Macs and their owners.
Also, try finding a college student or teacher to buy Office for you. The education discount is ridiculous.
Microsoft often makes the disingenuous assumption that there simply aren’t other operating systems out there. It’s creepy, when they do that.
I am simultaneously repulsed by and drawn to your tattoo. When did you get it?
Have you checked out NeoOffice? Don’t give Microsoft your money, give them the finger.
I was browsing Amex rewards shopping last night in the 25,000 – 28,000 range and one of the gifts I can get is Microsoft Office. Um, NO.
How did you get a picture of my tattoo?
Microsoft Bing? That sounds interesting. I’ll have to Google that when I get home.
demand a refund.
Bea Arthur shrinks my gonads. Sex FAIL.
Allison is right – this is MS’s lame-ass way of trying to get you to use their OS instead of Mac which is infinitely superior (and they know it).
My hubby uses Open Office on his PC stuff and loves it. Yes, we’re a “mixed couple” (Mac/PC).