Macbook Pro Diet
My computer died this morning. Like truly died. Goodbye, old friend. *sob* She was good to me. Kind of. Not great. Actually she sucked. OMG I hated that bitch. Screw her. I’m glad she’s dead. The G in G4 stands for OMFG you are such a gooch. One minute I’m IMing Mika, the next minute, my computer shuts down and I get the gray screen and it won’t load anything. It won’t go into safe mode, it won’t go into target disk mode, it wont go into any mode, except for the mode where it tells you to go F yourself.
So I went to the Apple Store.
I REALLY REALLY hate the Apple Store. Honestly. It’s so horrible. Everyone is so “that guy”. Like kind of condescending. I know exactly what I want and then they are trying to upgrade me or get Mobile Me and all that stuff and I’m like dudes. Seriously. Please, just…get it for me from the storeroom and you never ever have to see me again, ever. Until the next time it breaks and then I will be back in tears. Again. Always in tears. I rather buy stuff online, but you know how it is. Your computer breaks and then you need to deal with the situación muy pronto.
So now I have a new Macbook Pro and it is bittersweet. It is a hot jam. SUCH a hot jam. I will be picking up all the single ladies with this thing. Look, I’m running Photoshop and Flash! Holy crap! I can, like, swap windows n stuff. But like, dude, it’s so expensive. $2500!!!!!! WITH the student discount! So now I’m eating beans out of a can for the next three months. Beans. Out of a CAN, dudes. Or maybe some of this.
Or maybe, if I’m feeling fancy some of this.
Funny how both are products of Brazil. They must all have Macbook Pros down there too.
Oh I could do this, this one’s really cheap.
And if I’m feeling “wicked” cheap.
Yes, these are real items. I went grocery shopping last week at kind of a sketchy supermarket that only has roasted chickens and cereal. Sometimes you see things and you really have to take pictures of them. Now I must return to the store to get cans of beans. Maybe some toast. MAYBE. I do not want to blow my budget on toast. Beloved toast.
Alls you need is roasted chickens and cereal. The MacBook Pro will be worth the starvation. I promise!
Beans should help relieve your writer’s blockage.
still worth it
Ms. Biz: BEANS IN A CAN.
JimBob: If only it were that easy. I’d be eating beans everyday. Which I already do, for the diet.
Ramon: It is worth it, I just wish it were like $1000 cheaper.
Re: meat in a can
I’ve been learning to can things this year and bought a pressure cooker so I could “put up” canned albacore. I just got chickens, too and some are males which need to be eaten (there’s fodder for your discussions…) so I was thinking canned rooster. Can’t you just see the labels if it were a marketable product?
Heather: Canned rooster will make ca-ching. It’s like instant coq au vin.