I just got back from the genius bar. This has been a five day ordeal for me. The minimalist design that apple has revolutionized also applies to when it breaks. Because it either works completely or it doesn’t at all. So one morning i’m looking at the computer and a blue screen is shining back at me. “great” I say, and i put my ear to it to hear the harddrive clicking. Im the f*cking Mac whisperer now. So I carry it into the apple store. The concierge ask me if I have an appointment. I don’t, and I say “this is my internet” as I set down the Mac. While i’m talking to him he calmly walks away, as if he isn’t listening at all, to attend to another customer. He casually comes back and schedules me for an appointment that is three hours later. So I leave the mac there and I come back fifteen minutes before the appointment. The store is empty and I still see my name on the screen so I keep busy by looking around. But all of a sudden it’s past my appointment time and I still haven’t been seen yet. The genius who looked like a hobbit asks a man near him his name, the man says robert, and the hobbit asks him to sit down. This would be normal but it just so happens that roberts name was after my name… so i wait around some more… and then hobbit says to his bald friend “when is this andrew guy coming” (andrew is my name) and the bald guy says “I sure hope he comes to pick it up”. So i make eyes with both of them and I point to myself and then i continue to peruse all the useless crap in the store wondering why I ever bought a computer from here in the first place. So ten minutes later the bald genius sees me and apologizes for the time i’ll never get back. He tells me it’s by harddrive and I make sure to express that it has not been backed up recently. So he ends up “fixing” it which will allow me to back it up myself and then I would bring it in the next day for a repair. The mac freezes up on me while I try to back it up at home (murphy’s law). The blue screen taunting me. I carry it in the next morning and ask if they do back ups. The lady who was seeing me said she would go ask. She goes into the back room where apple employees drink their afternoon tea and talk about how shitty they treat their customers. She makes a joke or two with them about me and comes back fifteen minutes later with a few numbers she has pulled out of her pert round a$$. She has given me a price for the backups they offer and assures me that if they do end up replacing the harddrive that they will back it up for 60 dollars. I leave that place smiling thinking my problems are over. So yesterday I get a call, this is three days later from when I first went in, and a man is telling me they have replaced my harddrive and have fixed my mac. All I have to do is come in and pick it up. So I ask about the “backup” and he asks what I am talking about. They did not do a backup so I ask him to go ahead and to do that like the lady said they would do. So he says they will spend the rest of the day doing that and that I can expect to pick it up tomorrow. Well tomorrow is now today and I have lost complete faith in this fruit company that tries to make computers. I talk to a different man today who tells me that they have already shipped back my old harddrive, “what about the backup” I say, “what backup?” he says. So I talk to him and realize nobody is going to backup my computer and that nobody really cares. But I care that my old harddrive is in pieces now. All that was my computer is now gone and I have been raped by an army of apple employees. I finally convince the genius to go back in the room, to find my old harddrive and to find his manager. They both tell me they can’t do a backup and that I can’t leave the store with both my old harddrive and the computer they fixed that I need for schoolwork, work, banking, internet, e-mail. And that that’s against policy. I offer to buy the new harddrive. nope. All they do is look back at me while I tell them what is wrong with the store, while I tell them their apologies do me no good, while I tell them that neither one of them has done their job right and have not been helpful to any customers, and have not in any way treated me like a customer. The manager said he could try to do the backup but that I need to let them talk. So I said “thank you..” I said ” thank you.. for making me spend five days on my knees begging you to do what two seperate people have assured me they would do, and thank you for making me stay on my knees and to start bobbing on your limp dick to do it”… and then I left. So in 24-hours I will find out if they actually did what they said they would do.

Yeah… Apple… not so Genius.

Enjoyed the book – flashbacks to my time in Korea and also my husband’s Filipino family.

But I agree. Mac-guy is a total douche bag. It makes me stay in my PC cocoon of inefficiency.

Same with Altell. Altell guy needs to realize he’s no longer in a frat house before I’ll consider using his phone.

Aaron: I didn’t even know he had a name. I just call him the Machole. You should’ve arm wrestled him too. You would’ve won too. Your “pythons are sick”. Also why was your computer on the floor? WTF.

Fly: Yeah or just drink everyting w/ a lid and a straw.

Pedro: The data recovery services I looked into when my hard drive failed were about 600 to 1000 (USD). It’s like nothing I own or write is worth that much so I said fuck it.

I only spill things when I am drunk, that normally means I usually spill alcohol which pist me off a lot because it is a really precious drink but at least normally I don’t drink near my laptop or anything valuable apart from others people’s clothes.

But the other day I got a drip in my living room and it was really close to the laptop and made me scared. I remembered that when I was doing my final project/thesis for university I had a hard drive failure in August and it took me like 360 $ and 15 days to recover all the information.

I had to give it to an IT hacker friend of mine, nothing about going to official stores, but that was because non of the official stores where able to fix the problems….

Also, I bought a sweet ass black macbook and got drunk and stepped on it like two weeks after I got it and now there’s a crack slowly making its way across my screen. And the geniuses said it ain’t covered by AC & PS it’d cost $800 to fix… So I’m waiting until the crack arrives at its destination to get it fixed.