This is a hypothetical situation.
Let’s say that you are in a car. You are on your way home. You have the luxury of having a car in the City of New York. You are parking the car on the street in a very popular and nice neighborhood. Let’s say you see two people near a car. These two people look like nice people. Let’s say one is Asian. She has glasses. Let’s say that these two people, one being Asian with glasses, are having problems with the car that they have borrowed from a friend for the holiday weekend. The hood is up. They look distressed even though it is a Sunday afternoon, and just as the name promises, it is indeed sunny. These two people, one being Asian with glasses and perhaps a writer of some kind, are having problems with the car battery. Let’s say one person accidentally left the headlights on and the battery died. These things happen. It doesn’t really matter because it’s all hypothetical. The Asian girl with glasses approaches you. For simplicity’s sake, let’s call her Frannie. Frannie sees that you are parking your car right next to their car, which has the hood up. Frannie says, excuse me, can you please give us a jump. What do you say?
A) Sure!
B) No!
If your answer is B you are a dick. But again, this is all hypothetical. Let’s pretend you say, no, sorry, I do not have cables. Frannie then says, actually we have cables and they are ready to go, all hooked up, we just need someone with a running engine. Then you say, oh sorry, we can’t do that. Frannie does not understand. You are here, you are clearly on your way home and not in an emergency situation. You have a running engine, and it’s right next to the Asian girl’s vehicle. Frannie is confused. Her friend, let’s call him Mohn asks, can they help? She says, no, they don’t want to help. Frannie feels disappointed. For a good chunk of time she and Mohn have flagged down various cars and cabs who are unable to help or refuse to stop even though Frannie waves her arms and flashes her most winning, non-threatening smile. Now she finally runs into someone who can help, but refuses to help. Mohn calls a friend who just happens to be renting a car in the Isle of Manhattan. He comes by to jump the car. Let’s call him Zechariah. Even though Zechariah is about to leave for a very long trip to Savannah and is stressed out, he still helps. Because he is a good person. A very good person. While Zechariah jumps the car, a line of cars appear behind the cars. They are upset. They see there are cars blocking the street. Both hoods are up. There is nothing that can be done. Frannie has done her best to divert traffic away from the block, but people do not want to follow directions. Frannie does her best to explain the situation and offers to help them back up. Other cars back up. Except for one. The driver decides to yell at Frannie. She does her best to be polite. He gets very cross. Listen sir, she explains, there’s nothing that can be done. You will either have to back up or be patient. He does not like the two simple options presented to him. She walks away while he is yelling at her. Zechariah jumps the battery. He saves the day. Everyone is happy. As a reward, Zechariah gets a hug.
Let’s pretend Frannie is disappointed. She is surprised by people’s refusal to help. She believes that in other cities, people might help in this situation. She understands that not everyone in New York is like this, but sometimes it is difficult to remember. From this (hypothetical) situation, she learns a few valuable lessons. One, don’t leave the headlights on. Two, people can be dicks. Three, your friends never are.
Wow, I needed a jump for my car on a -10ยบ day in Minneapolis, MN. I was in a movie theater parking lot, in the day time, during the week. It was almost empty. A guy pulls up and offers to help jump my car and I think missed the beginning of his movie. I could not stop thanking him. I have never been refused help in MN.
Well, at least they acknowledge you. Feel good about that. Here in Phoenix, one of two things would happen:
1. they wouldn’t see you because everyone on our highway is an ass, so you don’t actually see faces. Only asses. Don’t ask me how they steer.
2. They would drive OVER you in their overpriced Escalades because you were delaying their tee-time which for some god-awful reason always seems to start at freakin’ rush hour!!!
3. They would drive INTO you because they didn’t see you while talking to Muffy on the damn cell phone while driving AND giving themselves a freakin pedicure!!!
Crap, that’s three things. Okay, well, one of those things might happen in Phoenix. Have a lovely day… FOOOORE!
poor Frannie…
I hope that dude that didn’t help Frannie gets a flat tire where there’s no cell service and has to walk eight miles in the snow to the nearest service station.
My husband, Peter, always stops and helps the stranded motorist. Which is nice because I get to sit in the car, stay warm and pick up some reflected good karma from his good deed. The only thing that bothers me is that I’m always afraid life will imitate movies, and it’s not a stranded motorist, it’s a serial killer and Peter will end up decapitated.
But still. Even I wouldn’t have been concerned in broad daylight on a busy street with loads of witnesses.
Debora: I know that New York is a “tough” place but there’s totally a difference between being “tough” and a total prick. New Yorkers can be tough but they don’t have to be rude. I was shocked really. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced anything like that ever here.
Queen D: When I was in junior high on a family vacation to somewhere that involved camping, we drove through Arizona and our car CAUGHT ON FIRE and three people pulled over to help us out. It was all very sweet of them.
Ian: You know, it’s just hypothetical….
Doretta: Yeah we were full of curses. I mean I couldn’t believe it. They were ON THEIR WAY HOME. They were holding Gymboree bags! They were old, so I’m assuming they had grandchildren. Their grandchildren are going to grow up to become total pricks.
Tracyene: Yeah I really don’t look that threatening on a Sunday afternoon, holding a coffee and a cell phone and looking a little desperate. Your husband is a good man. I’ve stopped before in the middle of a highway in the middle of the night after I’ve seen an accident go down to calm the driver and call 911 and wait. The driver was drunk, but still. As a human you have certain responsibilities. I mean, really.
Yeah, people here in Austin definitely help you out in situations like that. Not only do they help you out, they pull over to help — you don’t have to flag ‘em down. In fact, they literally line up to help. Even the creepy businessmen in sleek cars help in their own way: They slow down to about 10 mph, roll down their window, hold up their cell phone and ask if you need them to call 911 for you. I’m not necessarily saying Austin is better than NYC, I’m just sayin’.
I’m with Catherine, Frannie should move to Austin, where Asian girls with glasses are always helped.
Catherine and FlatGreg: I visited Austin for the first time this year and I loved it. I can’t believe how nice everyone is there and not in a fake way, just in a “default is being nice” way. As opposed to NY where people are kind of like “default is being suspicious”. Anyway Austin rocks. You guys are lucky. Also I like Veggie Heaven.
Absolutely! Who knew veggies could be so delicious?